Initial: Frederick
Profession: Psychology Undergraduate
Birthday: days left
Height: 1.76m
Weight: 63kg
Blood Type: A+
Waist size: 29-30 inches
Hobbies: Blogging; Reading; Songs & Movies; Chill out
Talent: Writing; Acting; Singing; Accents
Favourite Food:
Italian Food;
Kimchi Chigae;
Roti Prata
Most Disliked Food: Anything crustacean - due to allergy
Favourite Songs to Sing to: For You (self-composed) & The Promise
Favourite Body Parts: Nose; Jaws
Schools: Pei Chun Public School (1989 - 1995); Chong Boon Secondary School (1996 - 1999); Nanyang Polytechnic (2000 - 2003); Monash University (2006 - )
Current Pursuit: Bachelor of Behavioural Science
Research Interest: Evolutionary Psychology
Other Interests: Evolution; Genetics
Contact:
frederikan@live.co.uk
July 05, 2008
Finally I got the mood to blog.. Recently, I haven't been feeling well due to some very bad throat infection, body aches, and miserable emotions. I admit, I haven't been feeling very well lately. Perhaps that's the reason why I blog. Each time I have a problem or an issue, I would just blog my way. And sometimes when I wanted to express my feelings in
Existentialist, that feeling was gone even before I sit on my computer chair. I just wasn't in a mood to blog or write... I don't know why. Perhaps I have too many doubts, worries, and anxieties deep within me.
Life sucks now. That's the holy truth. I can never lie here that life is good. Maybe in front of others I have lied many times. Life is NOT good, and life IS a bitch. It is a struggle for existentence as usual and to exist is not just to find meaning in my life, but to avoid alienation by opposing the societal truth. Somehow I need to start giving life and vitality to my purpose and goals. But at the mean time, I am still searching for my identity.
It's pathetic, isn't it? Usually, in the course of growth and development, teenagers are people who are in their midst of searching for their identity. But for me, no matter how much I do admit that I understand myself, ironically, I still have a long way to go, because I still do not know what my true potential is, what my strengths are, what my weaknessess are, and who am I. I think I am young enough to still have the fire of idealism within me and there are a few things I aspire to do. However, idealism doesn't work unless I get down to serious business with myself. I do not have much contacts and I'm an introvert. I am seriously crying inside of me for some miracles and someone who understands and is willing to give me a hand... or be my companion or advisor.
Life sucks because no one cares. And no one is willing to even give a hand just by answering my fucking SMS, which is regarding my career. Is everyone that selfish? Well, perhaps that's life. But if that's life, then what the fuck am I or are we living for? For God? Goodness sake! Some God's people are uncaring and hypocrites, not to mention dependable. I am holding to grudges, and well, I find it very hard to forgive. Because right now, I feel VERY alone, not lonely. I don't get it. I don't bite; I don't shout; I am not rude... and I certainly don't kill. Where the fuck have all my friends gone to? Are they the same as the MNCs, the TNCs, or other corporations that doesn't even give a damn? Yes, I am strong with my words and speak the harsh truth about reality. But don't I deserve that little bit of credit by being a friend of many?
Life sucks because when you speak the harsh direct truth, and when you are opinionated, as well as when you screwed up some of your fucking sentences, you are fucked there and then. Yes, this is the type of personality that is considered a true friend - one who speaks the truth even though it hurts at times, and one who is willing to criticise for the good of another person. But it seems that no one wants a true friend.
EVERYONE wants either an crapper, a stunner, a fucker, a fool, a jerk, a seducer, a prostitute, a pimp, an asshole, a bastard, an idiot, and someone to do business with. Life sucks because of this.
Now you tell me, how shall I be at peace? I can't be at peace with everyone. I want to. But it is pretty hard these days. Even the muslims are not at peace with certain kinds of people. So what the fuck is Mohammed doing? Yea.. same goes like this: Even many of us are not at peace with one another because of differences, power, authority, money, career, and status. So what the fuck is society doing? FUCK society! FUCK the government! FUCK the world! And definitely, FUCK our environment. How about this (I think this is a good one)? - Even most of us are not at peace with ourselves. So what the fuck are WE doing? Hmm??
Fuck life.
Founding Days
۩ Classic Age
(04/2004 - 06/2005) -
04/2004;
05/2004;
06/2004;
07/2004;
08/2004;
09/2004;
10/2004;
11/2004;
12/2004;
01/2005;
02/2005;
03/2005;
04/2005;
05/2005;
06/2005
Bardic Circle I & II
† Stepping Out
(07/2005 - 11/2005)
Bardic Circle III
.: Renaissance
(11/2005 - 09/2006)
Snow-covered Territory
.: 冰世界
(09/2006 - 12/2006)
.: 冰世界2
(01/2007 - 06/2007)
Bardic Circle IV
.: Infinity
(07/2007 - )
•
Current available archives: -
11/2005
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01/2006
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03/2006
04/2006
05/2006
06/2006
07/2006
09/2006
10/2006
11/2006
12/2006
01/2007
02/2007
03/2007
04/2007
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06/2007
07/2007
08/2007
09/2007
10/2007
11/2007
12/2007
01/2008
02/2008
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04/2008
05/2008
06/2008
07/2008
09/2008
