DAMN!!!!! I can't meet Squidy today as our date was cancelled. Damn frustrating lah!!! I just wanna shout...

It's not everyday that I could spend time with her so each time we get to meet is a privillege.. and the moments we spend together are ten thousand times more prescious than water, even than the water from our saliva. Haiya.. saliva also water wad.. the Chinese don't call it 口水 for nothing, understand?!

Now I'm spending my time mugging in an enclosed room surrounded by four walls. I feel like a scholastic prisoner. And I wonder where is Squidy moving to next time? I heard it's in the west of Singapore. I hope it's not Jurong or Clementi. It's going to be so inaccessible for the both of us. I just pray we can grow to become more and more loving from now onwards so that distance will not keep us seperated.

Now, for some thoughts of the day...

There's always such changes in life that got me so frustrated over it. Yet God made it clear that the only constance in life is change, let alone light (Einstein's theory). I hate change, but at the same time, I love certain changes. I love it when I fall in love again. I don't mind falling in love again and again with the same person. That's really the thrilling part. Well.. the rest.. it depends on her really. I love it when things change for the better, at least in my perspective. We humans are like that. Good things = positiveness. That's why I love changes that are good, and hate changes that are bad, sore and hurting.

And it's sometimes so frustrating to feel psychologically attached to someone or something that you can't bear to let go at times. They say that goodbyes are the beginnings of the next meet up. I always believe in this because this phrase gives me the strength to look forward to the next day.

I would, too, freak out if some things take too long.. cos I'm impatient. I remembered when I was in primary school, I used to do an assignment for my Science unit. And in this non-graded assignment, we were each instructed to grow green bean seeds. So happily, I took home several of those seeds given to me by by teacher and grew them in a container beneath the cotton wool. I would regularly water the seeds and watch them grow. I got excited to see the leaves sprouting out of the seeds as they mature into little seedlings. They grew taller each day and I just got so ecstatic that what I was doing was just so cool! I felt great about myself that my experiment actually worked!

One day, those seedlings stopped growing. The growth slowed down no matter how I water them everyday faithfully and without fail. Days passed, the seedlings were still about the same length. Some were still in the process of growth. Now, being an impatient me, I watered them again and again. And this time, I poured a little bit more water on them, thinking that they may be thirsty and needed more water for growth. It didn't help. Their height still remained as they were. Therefore, I placed them in the sunlight (strong sunlight) and watered them again and again without realizing that the container is already flooded. Later, I realized that the cotton wool absorbed only a certain amount of water. The plants did not grow; they withered eventually. And I remembered waking up one day to find them lying on the floor and without life.

Well, it is my impatience that brought me to certain downfalls and partly because of my hot-headedness. I'm sharing this to tell all my viewers not to follow my footsteps. I've been through many hardships in order to realize the meaning behind every single purpose in my life. Even now, I'm still struggling with my temperamental problem.

I pray that our hectic lifestyles would not out-test our patience but rather, we learn to find our own peace of mind.
And jesus is indeed my source of peace whenever I'm troubled. I have found Him.